Inspired by a comic I read as a teenager... Some wise or rather less than wise advice I got sent... enjoy :)

  • Before attempting to remove stubborn stains from a garment, always circle the stain in permanent pen, so that when you remove the garment from the washing machine you can easily locate the area of the stain and check that it has gone.
  • Noisy neighbour's TV?  Order the same remote control, stand outside their lounge window and switch the powersave on and off :D.  It will drive them nuts.
  • Always poo at work. Not only will you save money on toilet paper, but you'll also be getting paid for it.
  • AVOID parking tickets by leaving your windscreen wipers turned to 'fast wipe' whenever you leave your car parked illegally.
  • OLD telephone directories make ideal personal address books. Simply cross out the names and address of people you don't know.

 

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So now we know how you spend your time at work..... *snicker*

Some more

  • Cheer loudly at 8.15pm each Saturday to fool the neighbours into thinking you have won the Lottery.
  • X-Files fans. Create the effect of being abducted by aliens by drinking two bottles of vodka. You'll invariably wake up in a strange place having had your memory mysteriously 'erased'.
  • Save money on expensive personalised car license plates by simply changing your name to match your plate. - Mr. HJ19 ABY
  • Avoid jet lag by simply taking an earlier flight, thus arriving fully refreshed and on time.
  • DRILL a one inch diameter hole in your refrigerator door. This will allow you to check that the light goes off when the door is closed.

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