Q. When I try to make beneficial changes in my life, I go about them so radically and compulsively that the whole process becomes a source of tremendous stress. I quit trying to make the change. How can I learn to be less compulsive?

 

A. Take it easy! Relax. Be kind and patient with yourself. Your compulsive nature is habitual now. Whatever you want to do, you bring in the same compulsive mind which has never learned to relax and let go.

 

Learn to pat yourself on the back and smile at yourself in the mirror for every little effort you make to channel your energy toward the positive. Learn to enjoy each of the chores of your daily life. Enjoy your bath. Become mindful while brushing your teeth. Repeat words of positive affirmation, reminders of the good things that are happening in your life. Even if there are things which are painful and frustrating in your life, don’t allow space in your mind for damaging thoughts that reinforce those patterns. If you go on and on about it, nothing is going to change. The only change will be for the situation to worsen.

 

If you can change the channels that your thoughts run in, if you change the patterns of your thoughts, through the power of thought, you will gradually see things changing for the better. Your purpose in these beneficial practices is simple. It is to bring relaxation. When you practice, make it simple. Begin with a short time. Expect few results to happen overnight. Be practical. Love yourself. Be always thankful for the practice you do however small it may be.

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