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As the time in my life came to pass, I became more and more hungry to understand the big picture; how does reality function?, what is GOD? and why I am here? I found the answers everywhere, but I still was never totally satisfied. I studied Buddhism and Taoism, I read the Torah and some of the Kabbalah, I went back and read the Bible (like a good Catholic school boy), I even dabbled in some recreational pharmaceuticals and finally went headlong into Quantum Physics. The answers came to me as quickly as I questioned and I still felt that there was nothing there for me.

My quest has taken in many directions, each bringing me to a new plateau. In my effort to understand Human consciousness, I came to the understanding that the point where the future becomes history must be experience. Consciousness is this point or the experiencer. As the future becomes history, our experience is vies through three basic apertures of consciousness: 1) Focus - where you put to the attention of your mind, then 2) Awareness - things in your mind that are there unintentionally and thirdly 3) Belief - where you are willing to place your faith. It all makes sense to me, but I know that I am more than just this.

My search continued only to find another three parts of us. 1) Who we think we are, 2) How other people see us and 3) How GOD sees us, the truth of what we are, each affecting each other as we choose what we experience. I looked at this as if we are trying to push three shopping carts down an aisle, difficult to steer the three separately. Then, watching the porter at the local grocery store put one cart inside each other, I realized that in order to find truth, each of the three views of ourselves need to be identical or at least going in the same direction. I found the common path is in the fulfillment of our potential. This is where all the parts of ourselves become one. The three versions of ourselves would all be the same as we realize our potential. How do we fulfill our potential?

I understand now that I based the choices that I’ve made in my life on past experience, what has already happened. These are the things on which I based my opinions and judgment. These habits or patterns may have served me in the past, but now they have been limiting my ability to experience more out of life. It’s time that I made a dramatic life choice. I am going to follow the foot steps of my future self. My future self, the possibility of me reaching my potential exists right now. My future self now guides me and reminds me that I need to be living in the moment, this moment, now. This new thinking opened a whole new perspective. During this sometimes overwhelming period, I came to realize that I had been living my life without purpose. Life without purpose is hardly a life. I sat and meditated on this and suddenly without thinking the words came out of my mouth, “My purpose in life is to bring human awareness to the understanding that there is an alternative to living life in this existence than what we have become accustomed to.” This is what I had been doing all along with my art, writing and music, as if I was building a semantic bridge beyond the world of words. My future self fulfilling my potential has always been there. I AM potential. This lead me to new understanding.

We are whole and perfect, already whole and perfect, as we were created, but our mind, our ego holds us down in fear, not allowing us to express our wholeness and perfection. 2) Everything that we see, we feel, taste, hear, all that we need, want, hope for, desire, pray for, and all the things we think, remember, dream, etc. Everything that we experience… has NO value and no meaning... except what we give it... what we choose to give it. 3) There is only one thing that we can be, become, be associated with. It was never given to us and can never be taken away and it's unique to us: It's our perspective, the point at which we say I AM.

Every new conclusion was accompanied by new questions. Who or what is this "I"? Is it the perceiver of experience or is it the experience of the perceived? I saw the duality, the yin and yang in everything. Truth was surrounded by paradox. I settled on this as being the structure of reality. I'm 43 now and it’s been over 30 years since I first started questioning the universe around me. It's a long time of searching only to discover "nothing". I began seeing the value of NOTHING. Nothing can't be defined or then, it becomes something. Nothing has no beginning or no end... Nothing has no container that can be empty... Nothing’s the lack of anything as if it never have had existed. Everything is manifest from nothing, returns to nothing, and is mostly made of nothing if you look at it from an atomic perspective. Nothing has no opposite, no shape, no form, no function, no absence. It is what separates us and what we all have in common. Love and nothing are the only two things that you can give away and never have less.

Now, everything started coming so fast, but I still wasn't sure of the function of my SELF. What I discovered was that the quality I observed, the value I assigned and the things that I defined were the SELF. The EGO promoted and protected the self by containing the SELF in the illusion of separation. Upon this realization I was overwhelmed with the sense of NOTHING. There is no separation. In my final holding on to my former self, I was afraid to release the fear of letting go.

Emerging, now knowing there is nothing beyond Self, I can see the value, the quality and the things I defined all were manifest from nothing. I choose my experience of the manifestation by assigning value, quality and meaning. Pain and unhappiness are now optional. Joy is a reality. My caterpillar self is now seeing what the butterfly sees as freedom. There is no world, only the value, quality and meaning that I choose to give experience.

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At 4:22am on November 22, 2012, Pranayama said…

Namaste Brian, 

"Nothing is more honorable than a grateful heart." - Seneca

I hope you have a loving, beautiful and very Happy Thanksgiving!

Much Metta, 


At 7:33pm on June 14, 2012, Ms.Gypsy said…

Let’s  Celebrate!!



In behalf of the Administration and the managers we want to send you lots of blessings, light and love on your birthday.  A day to celebrate  and cherish.  Let the Angels embraced you with there love now and forever. With love and blessings.
Ms. Gypsy

At 11:55am on June 14, 2012, Alison said…

Sai Ram, Blessings of Love & Light to you on your special day. xxx

At 12:04pm on June 14, 2011, Charlie said…


Count your life by smiles, not tears. Count your age by friends, not years.

May each and every passing year bring you wisdom, peace and cheer.


Many Blessings of Peace, Love, Joy and Abundance to you


At 11:18am on June 14, 2011, Mark Seebach said…
Happy Birthday, {{{Brian}}}! May the anniversary of your incarnation, be filled with moments of Divine Connection! Thank You for choosing to join us on this beautiful journey!
At 4:47am on June 14, 2011, Anamarija said…

The Mother's heart, the hero's will,
The softest flowers' sweetest feel;
The charm and force that ever sway
The altar-fire's flaming play;
The strength that leads, in love obeys;
Far-reaching dreams, and patient ways,
Eternal faith in Self, in all,
The light Divine in great, in small;
All these and more than I could see,
Today may "Mother" grant to thee!

Happy Birthday! :)
At 3:58am on June 13, 2011, Aranaea said…
Happy Birthday!!
At 12:31pm on June 14, 2010, Charlie said…
Dropping by to wish you a very Happy Birthday! May your day be filled with Love and Laughter :)
Many Blessings of Peace, Love, Joy and Abundance to you

At 11:04pm on August 9, 2009, Hazii Harold said…


At 6:12am on July 24, 2009, Hazii Harold said…

Profile Information

Please tell us a little more about yourself.
"I am the Light of the World,
the Shining Example,
But, in order for this to be True for Me,
The Same has to be True for You,
and I know it's True for Me>"

1. I see a world in harmony with nature.
2 I see a world of awakened people who know who they truly are.
3 I see the world allowing a perfect system of equality.
4 I see a world of radiant health.
5 I see of world of abundance.
6 I see a world of symbiotic resonance.
7 I see a world of humble confidence.
8 I see a world where every one is the dominant force of their sovereign being
9 I see a world of that has reached the point of choice-less obligation accepting freedom in every moment.
10 I see the world as a shining example for the universe

My mission is to awaken the world to their "authentic SELF" by allowing GOD's love to flow through me.
Are there any other web sites where you can be found? (This can include other personal and/or business web sites, Facebook, Twitter, LinkedIn, and Skype addresses.)
I have read and agree to the guidelines set forth by Humanity Healing International (These can be found under the 'Guidelines' tab at the top of the page.).

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